My therapist gave me a homework assignment: 30 minutes of journaling through my blog daily. The primary goal is to figure out my identity. Who is the Tranquil Trophy Wife? And what exactly would I like my life to look like? Because I’m the author of my life’s book, and I get to make it look however I want. It’s 2026, I am no longer blaming other people for the choices I make. I’m officially taking accountability for the body, career, social life, habits, and overall lifestyle I want. Words hold power, and I’m no longer allowing my negative thought patterns to hold me back from building my dream life.

I’ve struggled a lot throughout the years with understanding who I am. I often feel like being a wife and mother has consumed me to the point where I severely lack individuality. But my husband and kids aren’t responsible for this ‘personality deficiency’. Truthfully, I’ve just never had any hobbies. Last year was the first year I actually sat down with myself to figure out what things I really like and reminisced on a few childhood dreams I once had. This led me to one obvious thing, baking.

As a kid, I just knew I wanted to be a cookie cooker. I’m not quite sure where the thought came from. I do, however, know I spent most of my childhood watching The Food Network with my grandma. She also had a ton of cookbooks I loved flipping through. Her next-door neighbor would gift us a holiday cookie box every Christmas, and I still think about the chocolate dipped laced cookies we’d get.

Aside from The Food Network, I watched a lot of TLC. TLC used to be far more educational than it is now. Cake Boss and Cupcake Wars were two of my favorite TV shows. Something about dessert always brought me joy.

When I was in high school, I spent a year in culinary arts. I loved the class, didn’t love the teacher. Still, I had a strong interest in going to Johnson & Wales University in Miami. It was really the only college I could envision myself enrolling in. Life took a different route though. I got married during my senior year, and moved to Okinawa, Japan with my husband shortly after.

Somewhere along the way, I let go of my cookie cooker dreams and morphed into a poor imitation of Lynette Scavo from Desperate Housewives. Because I couldn’t go to my dream school, I decided to let go of the dream entirely. And the dream was buried so deep, it actually took me over 10 years to uncover it.

After years of watching people bake sourdough online, I finally felt ready to begin my journey. I felt like I seen every possible sourdough question, error, risk, success, and troubleshoot possible. So, I made a starter. Unfortunately, it refused to become active. It took months of me trying before I asked my neighbor if she baked sourdough. Lucky for me, she said yes! She happily gifted me some of her starter, and I have never had a bad loaf since!

This sourdough experience has subconsciously uncovered my childhood dreams of becoming a cookie cooker. Because guess what– I’ve actually learned how to bake sourdough cookies. Baking sourdough has given me the confidence to explore more with baking in general. And this process has brought me so much joy. I’m experimenting creatively in a way I’ve never given myself permission to.

At 30 years old, I’ve resurrected my childhood dream and turned it into a hobby that makes me happy. So, please allow me to reintroduce myself as Ash– the Tranquil Trophy Wife, and the Cookie Cooker.